Like a child with a behavioral problem, we were back and asking for it again. After an extended five months off from the road, we decided to dust off the trailer and our trusty van, the Palace, and hit the road again. This time, we were bringing our new drummer, JT Massacre and new Voodoo Doll the Vancouver spitfire, Ruby Roulette. What better way to debut the both of them than a off-the-wall show at Richards on Richards with Southern Culture On The Skids? We opened for SCOTS and later they invited s-Careoline to bellydance and Little Miss Risk to hula hoop up with them onstage. Not a bad way to kick off a tour.

After a late start, we left Vancouver behind in a wash of rain, mud and cussing on the way to Nelson. Nelson lived up to it's reputation as a town full of party folk when Brendan from BC/DC came out (and later filled us full of blender drinks) as well as the usual suspects and a few new ones, too! After being rudely awakened early in the a.m. (well, early after a eight hour drive and show the night before) John nearly came to blows with the manager of the hostel. Apparently no one told the guy that walking into a room to wake someone up isn't such a hot idea. I'm sure medical science can grow his arm back, though.

SIT DOWN HOLD ON ... AND HELLO RUBY & JT!!

Golden pulled through and every damn person in the manager's little black book came out en masse down at the Roadhouse, it - game on! A few days later Ruby, who had never been out of the province of British Columbia before, made the brave leap to Alberta. After stopping by the (potentially) scenic Pilsner Gardens, we did the only logical thing to do: had a photoshoot in basement of the club, which is a former opium den and reputed to be haunted. The only spirits we saw were the ones in the bottom of the Jagermeister bottle, though.

LOOK-OUT LETHBRIDGE!

From Lethbridge to Edmonton, where the local burlesque beauties from the Devil's Pussycats were in the Sidetrack audience, egging the Dollz on (like they need convincing!) while sCare-oline's hip-shakes were causing some definite hits on the richter scale. What to do the morning after in Edmonton when your hung over? Go watch a sea lion show! They were pretty good, but let's see them twirl tassels or handle a Grestch. Up to Jasper where the snow was in full swing making for a chilly load in, but the local pyschobilly band Grave Mistake, heated things up. So much fun that we almost forgot that we had to pay a large security deposit after the last time John tried to fix a TV in the middle of an all-night party.

The boys made sure to not only bring all their friends in their Kustom Kar Klub the night after in Red Deer, they took us to their house and got us liquored up before the show. While s-Careoline was down for the count with food poisioning (for some reason Red Deer is the Bermuda Triangle for this band getting food poisioning. Look it up on Wikipedia.) the rest of us were out getting into trouble before the show with the Kar Klub. PS: The key to fun in Red Deer? One word: 'Derek'. You'd think that we couldn't top that night, but the next night in Calgary with the Rambling Ambassadors we did! Our friends from Red Deer even came out to the show. I think they were auditioning for the spot of tour manager, but that spot is already spoken for! More fun throughout the praries in sub-zero weather including Saskatoon where Miss Roulette got really rambunctious after J.T. showed her a tour secret known only by the true old school touring musicians. She quickly added to the tradition, too. I think there's something that happens around -10 degrees when Voodoo Dollz go crazy.

HANGING WITH THE BATS

The madness carried on through Regina to Winnipeg, where BJB went off in search of trouble after the show, and the Voodoo Dollz were busy getting into trouble at the hotel. We won't say that those two start fights, but they sure do finish them! To wind down from their tag-team match, they went to Lucy's Secret Closet, the roost ruled by the glorious Maggie for some shopping to take their minds off of their bloody knuckles. How do you spell trouble? V-O-O-D-O-O-D-O-L-L-Z! Fargo - always crazy, always fun. The local fun instigators were up to their usual tricks and were sure to take us along for the ride. From there to St.Paul, where we had a fun show with the Corpseshow Creeps. Afterwards, we decended on our friend Ryan's house, though we decided to give the White Castle a miss this time around. If you ever want to hear a filthy tour story, ask us how the White Castle burger 'sliders' came by their name. We passed the day off by doing what anyone would if they found themselves in Minneapolis - we went to the Mall Of America and ordered every drink off the menu at the tiki bar.

After the tiki bar worked it's magic on us, we hit Vnuck's with Bobby Rivera and the Riveria's. We were denied our promised pig-roast with them due to some silly "zoning laws", but we'll get a luau together next time around. A few states over Iowa has themselves a blizzard in full swing. At Hairy Mary's sCare-oline signed a new friend's upright and gave it a spank for him, while the Dollz took turn pouring booze down his throat. Once done with Des Moines the group headed to Denver, the happiest place on earth according to s-Careoline... Bender's rocked while Little Miss Risk drooled over the local burlesque beauties, Burlesque As It Was, headed by Vivian Vavoom. The mountain air did everyone good and it was in high spirits (and altitude) that everyone piled into The Palace and headed over to Salt Lake City.

WHAT ELSE DO YOU DO IN DES MOINES?

SLC is where the Voodoo Dollz generally ignore the warnings from the morality police. "No officer, don't pour kerosene on that burning pyre." Burt's Tiki Lounge got a taste of sass from everyone, the only ones missing were Durwood and Sweatin' Willie. Either on tour or being held by the US Government in a secret containment unit, we're not entirely sure. December 11th came again, and with it bringing BJB's birthday for which he boughht himslef a vintage Slingerland drujm kit to match his snare drum. No, he can't play drums. We don't ask anymore. sCare-oline and the Dollz fixed up the Zebra for the occasion and made sure that two bottles of the cheapest champagne available was on hand for BJB to down onstage. It's not a 68th birthday party until BJB is carried out at the end of the night, and we gave him a good run for his money while all our friends in Montana came out to help him celebrate in true western style.

The weather gave us enough of a break to get out to Boise then took a turn for the worse, and on the trek to Portland, we arrived in time to see the coast slammed with th eworts storm in 20 years. We made it to Devil's Point, a cool little sister club to our regular spot, Dante's. It wasn't in the cards for us to play a full-on show, since the wind brought down the wires, and the power was out. Nessesity is the mother of invention... the band played their first accoutic set ever, with a very cool looking crowd who spent two hours with them in the dark, lit by candles. That's a helluva way to spend the night in an antique strip joint - MERRY XMAS MAMA!!